Infected

Each drop of rain, the warmth of the sun
Every gust of wind, the silver moonlight
I'd give it up, for you, I would
But are you really worth the sacrifice?

Every step taken towards you
Towards my doom it sends
I'm at the edge, and yet I can't stop
Is this how you'd thought it ends?

What happened to forever?
What happened to the promises,
That were never to be broken?
What changed us so much?
What made us utter those words,
That were never to be spoken?

I'm confused. I'm lost.
Don't know what to say
I need a savior right now
But you need to go away.

My eyes are still damp
My heart still aches
Weighed down, by all this guilt
That stems from my mistakes.

You were like a tiny raindrop
You were once the warmth in my life
The gust of wind that blew through my hair
You were my silver moonlight.

I want you, I need you
Please come back to me
Love me or kill me
But please just set me free.

I am heartless, I am soulless
Just leave me alone
Stab me or save me
Still have no one to call my own.

Disorientation hits me
As I try to stand
Realization dawns
As I look for your hand.

I love you and hate you
On the very same page
You've filled my heart
With passion and blind rage.

You gave me a dream to hold on to
I kept it alive, despite all my flaws
Only to watch as it inexplicably vanished
An illusion is what it truly was.

This isn't love, not anymore
This isn't the heaven we built
You see this lie, that you call life?
The fantasy is dead, all that's left is the guilt.

I am numb, I am tired,
I am dead.
I am beaten, I have lost,
I am infected.